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BLOOD HARVEST (1985)
aka NIGHTMARE
Directed by Bill Rebane
Retromedia DVD
Reviewed 02.09.06
Review by Joseph A. Ziemba
THE FILM
Tiny Tim is kneeling at an alter,
weeping, and covered in clown make-up.
You've been waiting your whole life
for a scene like this. Hold that
thought.
The late Tiny Tim was in Wisconsin
for a beer tent carnival appearance
during the summer of 1985. He probably
performed an updated version of
"Tiptoe Through The Tulips"
with a drum machine and saxophones.
Cracked Wisconsin filmmaker Bill
Rebane (The Giant Spider Invasion,
Invasion From Inner Earth)
was in the audience. Inspiration
struck. A deal was made. Elastic
pants were purchased. Greasepaint
was applied. In a few short months,
Blood Harvest aka Nightmare
was shot in Lincoln County, Wisconsin
and completed.
Please. PLEASE. Please hit the bathroom
before attempting to watch this
film. As any well groomed member
of society knows, shitting your
trousers can be a very delicate
situation. You'll thank me later.
Jill is home from college. After
foreclosing the mortgages on several
private properties, her parents
(they own THE BANK) have disappeared.
The family's home is the victim
of graffiti and hilarious obscene
phone calls. Gary, Jill’s
childhood friend, is in love with
her. He also has a brother/one-man-play
named “Merv,” “Mervo,”
or my favorite, “The Magnificent
Mervo.” That’s where
Tiny Tim comes in; a bloated, smelly
man-child in a satin stretch suit
and flannel shirt, spewing songs
and reciting sloppy Holy Mary’s.
Jill bares it all quite frequently.
At this point, you can probably
just think up anything and pretend
it happens. A pessimist sheriff
in a softball uniform. A survivalist
killer with a polaroid fetish. A
bloody refrigerator. It’s
all fair game. By the time Gary
strips to make love to an unconscious
Jill, the upside-down bodies in
the old shed’ll seem like
greasy kids stuff. I hope.
Joining the ranks of Doris Wishman’s
ridiculously strange A
Night To Dismember, Blood
Harvest will knock you flat.
It’s not enough that Bill
Rebane called an about face on his
typical PG themed endurance tests,
filling this film to the brim with
exposed breasts and klutzy gore.
Nope, he had to exacerbate us even
more, throwing in the hideous Tiny
Tim, meaningless religious motifs,
and trunkfuls of dumb ideas that
never tally up. All presented with
thick Wisconsin accents and random
edits; a benchmark of Rebane’s
particular brand of flair. Then
it hits you.
When the laughs die down and the
tame-yet-unsettling depravity takes
over, Blood Harvest makes
the transition from goofy trash
nonsense to dirty-ass shocker. The
gross shag carpet, the killer’s
brutal antics, the “assumed”
innuendos...everything points to
an underbelly of perversion that
nicks your nose just enough to make
the room smell uncomfortable. It’s
almost too much for one sitting.
Good thing you made a pit-stop beforehand,
huh?
AUDIO AND VIDEO
Released in 2002, Retromedia’s
full frame “director’s
cut” of Blood Harvest
(here titled Nightmare)
is heavy on the glorious grain and
woozy colors. There’s a little
video rippling here and there, along
with some strangely placed still
shots and jump cuts. No compression
noise was evident and the mono sound
was hissy-fit perfect. Loved the
newfangled PowerPoint credits!
A few months after its release,
the DVD was pulled from stores as
a courtesy, following a mix-up with
the rights. When the issue was later
resolved, Retromedia decided to
sub-license Rebane’s swan
song instead of reissuing it. You
can currently find Blood Harvest
(again, as Nightmare) on
Brentwood’s “Psychotic
Tendencies” 4-pack. Retromedia’s
DVD will remain deleted forever.
EXTRAS
Call the cops. “The Tiny Tim
Sideshow” is fifteen minutes
of public access production values,
behind the scenes stills, and on
set video blurbs. Sounds pretty
normal, but guess again. Bill Rebane
tried to get a Tiny Tim children's
television pilot sold. The footage
is here. A weird guy in a toupee
sits in front of a fireplace and
introduces the film. Bill Rebane
talks into the camera and chomps
a cigar. Needless to say, I'm amazed.
And disturbed. If you know a good
therapist, watch it back-to-back
with the feature. Also included
is an eight-shot strong still gallery.
FINAL THOUGHTS
A complete surprise from the typically
flat Bill Rebane, Blood Harvest
is a warped, nonsensical scab of
80s weirdness. Whether it's via
Retromedia's out of print disc,
or the more recent Brentwood release,
you need to see this film. Viva
Wisconsin!
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Home for the holiday
Salut, Mr. Tim
The Classic
Girls Nite Out
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