CANNIBALS (1980)
aka MONDO CANNIBALE
aka WHITE CANNIBAL QUEEN
Directed by Jesus Franco
Blue Underground DVD
Reviewed 03.20.08
Review by Joseph A. Ziemba

THE FILM
I don't know a lot about cannibal culture, but beer guts and flip-flops appear to play a large role in it. Salut, Master Franco!

There's an old saying about the psychology of performance. Always look better than your audience -- no matter what. The Beatles with their matching Chesterfields on Ed Sullivan? Steve Martin in a pressed white suit during his stand-up days? Jess Franco with his exotic sense of design? Yep, yep, and yep. Without the tight compositions, dizzy visuals, and strategic reverb, Cannibals is just another cheap trasher about savages in flip-flops. However, with that Franco panache on board, it's just another cheap trasher about savages in flip-flops...but it is dressed for success. As I stare down at my tattered, food-stained robe, comprehension flourishes.

Professor Taylor (Zombie's Al Cliver), he of The Beach Boys circa "15 Big Ones" flair, loses his wife, left arm, and daughter to a band of clown-faced cannibals. Amnesia. Years pass. Love. No more amnesia. After convincing a group of socialites that his now-adult, now-sexy daughter may still be alive, Dennis Wilson -- sorry -- Prof Taylor organizes a "cannibal hunt". Get the rifles! To the jungle! Showdown! That's all she wrote!

The padded-out Cannibals isn't on par with Bloody Moon, Dracula, Prisoner Of Frankenstein, or any of your personal Jess Franco million-sellers. Yet, there's no fault in that. Variety? Action? Explanation? Bah. The extended gore scenes are genuinely disorientating; they're surreal, hi-fi versions of Nathan Schiff's manic carnage. Dubbing is completely inappropriate (and flat-out hilarious). Nudity spreads out evenly. While these things keep the eyes at attention, the pull is the style, not the substance. Lighting, compositions, zooms...Cannibals looks sharp, but asks nothing of your consciousness. When sitting down with a lesser Jess Franco film, that's a big part of what I look forward to.

That, and jungle savages with wedding rings.

AUDIO AND VIDEO
Excellent. Of the small number of Franco films that I've seen on DVD, this one takes the cake. The 1.66.1 anamorphic widescreen print is in terrific shape, bloated with color, contrast, and delectable grain. Damage was minimal. The sound was in mono and I liked it just fine.

EXTRAS
In addition to the French theatrical trailer, a charming 20 minute interview with old man Franco is included. Between cigarette breaks, the cardigan-clad Jess delivers an extremely blunt diatribe on everything Cannibals: origins, shooting in Madrid, stupid actresses, and working with gypsies. Best quote? "No one wants to fuck a puppet." Tell that to Chester N. Turner.

FINAL THOUGHTS
I get it. And I liked it. Cannibals is an ideal rental for those of us with a Jess Franco sweet tooth. You won't remember it two days from now, but the chince-class puts on the ritz and turns a lazy weeknight into something better. Especially if you’ve got a pair of flip-flops lying around.

Point them to the keg


Surf's up


Salut


Allegiances