INTRUDER
(1989)
Directed By Scott Spiegel
Wizard Entertainment DVD
Reviewed 08.10.05
Review by Joseph A. Ziemba
THE FILM
Independent supermarkets are sooooo
80s. Come to think of it, gory slasher
films hit their ebb in the "me"
decade as well. I think I hear a
light bulb exploding.
Just so you know, not every project
attached to the Evil Dead
"family" yields glistening
rainbows (The Nutt House,
anyone?). This time around though,
we're in for a trea -- ha ha, just
kidding! Intruder isn't
too good. It's basically a one gimmick
frenzy of stylish violence, played
out over a night of action down
at the Walnut Lake Market. Yep,
this is an exceedingly gory slasher
set in a small town supermarket,
courtesy director Scott Spiegel
(Evil Dead II writer, Sam
Raimi’s lifetime pal) and
a sedan full of related Deadites.
I know that sounds like a recipe
for solid kicks, but don't be upset
when your eyelids grow heavy. Like
twenty times in a row.
Craig Peterson is a grade-a '89
bad ass. Armed with his leather
jacket, white t-shirt, and wet mullet,
Craig descends upon the Walnut Lake
Market, hoping to entice the libido
of his ex-g.f., Jen. After causing
a ruckus, Jen's late shift coworkers
(including Sam and Ted Raimi and
Renée Estevez from Sleepaway
Camp II) manage to subdue Craigy
and give him the boot. Forty minutes
later, everyone stops talking and
somebody begins knocking off the
team. The rubbery gore escalates
with each kill and the acting grows
increasingly worse. There's a Crispin
Glover rip-off character, awful
music (think Toxic Avenger
meets Battlestar Galactica),
and Bruce Campbell shows up for
a minute or so. When the killer
revealed his motivations, I revealed
my fast forward button.
Before you get the wrong idea, Intruder
had some promising potential. Unfortunately,
the goods just weren't plentiful
enough. Rather than matching up
the impressive cinematography and
editing (shots from behind a booze
bottle, inside a moving shopping
cart) with an equally manic script,
the film treads water with a concept
that croaks after the first reel.
You're left with gore for gore's
sake, dumb plot ticks (How hard
can it be to exit a supermarket?),
a slow motion pace, and a lack of
freshness, despite the frantic techniques
on display. Yeah, the gore was sploochy,
but what's the big deal? Nothing
we haven't seen before in more enjoyable
contexts. I even tried to laugh
at something...anything...even the
intentional bits of character-driven
comedy. Time for go to bed.
I'll give Sam Raimi this much: in
'88, he had the Larry Fine routine
down pat. Smiling at his Stooge-related
homages (“Oh...I did.”)
was my only option.
AUDIO AND VIDEO
One of the kick off releases from
Charles Band's revived Wizard Entertainment
(80s big box kings), Intruder's
presentation isn't exactly a red
ribbon celebration. Appearing uncut
for the first time on North American
home video, the quality of the full
frame print itself is nice (bright
colors, thick contrast, zero imperfections),
but a big DVD boo-boo rears it's
ugly head. Namely, compression artifacting.
Darker scenes, which comprise a
majority of the film, get the big
blocks in spades. The pixels aren’t
so apparent during more saturated
scenes, but when it's there, it's
there. Got it? Good. The mono sound
was loud and clear, no problems
at all.
EXTRAS
There's a new promo trailer for
Intruder and three trailers for
additional Wizard releases: Monsters
Gone Wild, Cinemaker
("You too could be making movies
like these!"), and When
Puppets And Dolls Attack. Where's
Gilbert Gottfried when you need
him?
FINAL THOUGHTS
If you're a desperate slasher fiend
and don't mind average films, give
Intruder a rent. Given
the quality of the movie and the
disc's presentation, I'd amscray
on a purchase. Normal people should
steer clear altogether and spend
their time doing something else. |
Terror in The Aisles
Not sure this works...
Icey steel
The very least of it
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