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DEADLY DREAMS (1988)
Directed by Kristine Peterson
Virgin Vision VHS
Reviewed 12.21.06
Review by Joseph A. Ziemba
THE FILM
Ladies and gentlemen, we have cocaine!
And that's about it!
By the late 1980s, the market on
disturbing Christmas-themed imagery
in trash films was cornered. Christmas
Evil played up the sex-trauma
angle. Don't
Open 'Til Christmas laid
down the violent sleaze. Silent
Night, Deadly Night did
it all. In 1988, Deadly Dreams
was tapped out of holiday deviance.
The film was still made. That's
good news for two types of people:
Women who are attracted to the manly
musk of a damp, late 80s mullet
and gay men. Deadly Dreams
is a flatline bore that’s
coiffed with homoerotic whispers.
Yet, the film was directed by a
woman. Tell me Evil
Laugh, WHERE DOES THAT
LEAVE US?!
On Christmas Eve, Alex witnesses
the shotgun killing of his parents
at the hands of a disgruntled employee,
who wears a wolf-hide mask. Ten
years later...Alex has bad dreams
about the Wolf Man, worse taste
in decorating, and likes to walk
around in a towel. He's also a dead-ringer
for Jonathan from "Who's The
Boss". Alex's best friend,
Danny, deals and snorts cocaine
while getting jealous of Maggie,
Alex's dance major girlfriend. He
yells, "What do you see in
her?!" while Alex bitches back,
"I jinx you, you pig bitch!"
Whoa! Meanwhile, everybody hollers
a lot, we get a close-up of a knife
popping up in front of Alex's boxer-shorted
crotch, and a bed rotates during
a limp sex scene. There are a few
decent twists towards the end. I
woke up just in time to catch them.
More R-rated soap opera than horror,
Deadly Dreams is the epitome
of filler. Too many flashbacks.
Too many dream sequences. Indifferent
direction. If it wasn't for the
humorous sexual leanings (Coincidence?
Indecision?), there'd be nothing
much to do. I mean, who gives a
crystal reindeer knick-knack to
a boy on Christmas anyway? Tapped
out.
AUDIO AND VIDEO
S'OK by me. Dialogue was on the
ground and ragged, but the print
was in fine shape. Somebody went
heavy on the blue tints.
EXTRAS
Pumped. Lyle Alzado is The Destroyer.
He's an electrocuted killer. The
trailer looks good, but I bet Death
Row Diner is far more fulfilling.
FINAL THOUGHTS
The moldy bottom of the trash-Christmas
well reverberates with shame. If
you're lucky, Deadly Dreams
might entertain for five minutes.
After that, it's a confused chore.
I'd rather watch Elves
again. |
A holly jolly shotgun
Wolf breath
Alex, you're confused
P. Keaton
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