THE NIGHT AFTER HALLOWEEN (1979)
aka SNAPSHOT
Directed by Simon Wincer
Magnum Home Entertainment VHS
Reviewed 10.28.05
Review by Joseph A. Ziemba

THE FILM
Magnum Home Entertainment: you've just made my shit list.

Before we get off on the wrong foot, be assured of one thing. The Night After Halloween is not a terrible film. It's just not a horror film. Taking it one step further, the plight of lost soul/fashion chanteuse Angela has nothing to do with the holiday of Halloween. Absolutely, positively NOTHING. The closest we get is the onscreen title (The Day After Halloween), cleverly rendered in the exact typeface utilized in John Carpenter's magnum opus. Magnum picked up the Australian-lensed Snapshot, chopped out the title screen, and plastered the big box with an exaggerated synopsis and a knife-endowed calendar. Caution: genius at work.

The life of a young hairdresser is fraught with emotion, danger, and exposed breasts. Money talks, I guess. Tired of the styling grind, our lead girl Angela somehow falls in line with lesbo Madeline, who in turn entices Angie with the forbidden fruits of modeling. Topless shoots, scummy producers, an artiste with a boner for dead animals; that’s how we spell jetset. It’s all very happening until Angela gets kicked out of her house and stalked by her boyfriend, who drives a bitchin’ pink ice cream truck. Where will she turn? Why, the discotheque, of course! After at least one hundred close ups of various camera privy parts (seriously...that one zoom lens was so sensual), Angela finds out who’s really been stalking her in a double twisto of droopy proportions. God, I’m depressed.

Call it a Lifetime tearjerker, call it a porno for camera enthusiasts...just don’t call it pointed. The Night After Halloween is well acted and technically polished. It’s a downbeat drama with a predictable premise and a couple of weird touches (pig’s head...in the bed). However, when I sit down to revel in the spirit of All Hallow’s Eve, I’m not looking for an ice cream truck with “Mr. Whippy” plastered on the side. Or an extended photo shoot on the beach. Magnum, you’ve taken the cake. Never before have I seen such a hilarious disregard for audience intelligence. Wait a minute...that means me. God, I’m depressed.

AUDIO AND VIDEO
Looking past some terrible pan and scan, the print looks pretty fantastic. The colors are bright and oversaturated, showing off lots of grain and deep blacks. The big box and tape reek of old lady cigarette breath. Nasty.

EXTRAS
The box looks kind of nice on my shelf. The perks are few, but must be embraced.

FINAL THOUGHTS
Just in case you missed it, The Night After Halloween has nothing to do with Halloween. Your Mom might enjoy it, but there’s really no reason to ever watch this film. Ever. Tally-ho Jack-O, here I come!

'Roid rage


Let's get serious


That sucks


I'm not sure either