THE SLAYER (1982) Directed by J.S. Cardone
Continental Video VHS
THE FILM
First of all, who in their right mind would set sights on a romantic vacation for four to a dumpy island tenement? Second, didn't Kay get the memo? Nobody wants to hear about her paintings. Nobody. Thirdly...ah, what's the point, I'm just going to -- OH GOD KAY STOP MAKING OUT WITH THAT BLOODY HEAD!!
Once I gained my wits, I figured it all out pretty quickly. The Slayer follows a predictable template, drains your patience in the process, but delivers enough shocking weirdness to get you through the night. Part of the UK's "Video Nasties" list in the early 80s, this supernatural slasher stakes unique territory for the time period, pre-dating A Nightmare On Elm Street with its focus on dream based carnage. On the good side, this is a low budget regional slasher from Georgia, there's a sullen creepiness in the air, and the grue is quite alarming. Unfortunately, the film stops dead on more than one occasion, throwing the pace completely off track. You like sitting around the house and doing nothing, right? Director J.S. Cardone sure does too; so much so that he devotes half of his debut picture's runtime to it.
Four twerps on a deserted island are forced to fend against an unknown evil. Ouch. Take a number, Humongous. Poor Kay has been suffering from nightmares that come true her whole life. When they start to affect her painting career (???), boyfriend Eric charters a tug boat and sets sail for the dilapidated sanctum, in hopes that a good vacation will set things straight. Along for the ride is Kay's wisecrackin' brother and his mom-looking girlfriend (obviously there for titillation, but, er...). Kay has bad dreamz. Everyone yells frequently. But are the dreams really happening? As if you couldn't guess, everyone gets it from an unseen POV camera, resulting in some crazy gore (the pitchfork -- how'd they do it?!) and lots of padding. Too much padding. So much padding that the film almost chokes to death. As for the ending: fantastic.
Great concept with a welcome dose of restless tension, but poky as a whole; that's where The Slayer ends up. My advice would be to take a time machine back to 1982, find Continental's phone number, call them up, and strongly urge them to keep on cutting (and don't stop with the ill-fitted classical music, either). I'm pretty sure that's not possible though. Just tap your fast forward button instead. Instant classic.
AUDIO AND VIDEO
After two minutes of absolute disaster (tape slowing down, frequent lines, jumping), The Slayer got on track. The print used here is scratched up quite a bit and lies on the dark side of things. A little worn, but hey, that's life. Incidentally, this version of the film is cut by five minutes or so, in order to make room for the second feature. But rejoice. Continental trimmed some house-sitting towards the end (thank you), obviously signaled by a sudden fade in/out. All of the havoc seems to be intact.
EXTRAS
Oh, yes. Presented as a full on second feature is Fred Olen Ray's Scalps, which was released uncut last year on DVD, courtesy Retromedia. Like The Slayer, this version was slightly cut due to time constraints by those tapeheads at Continental. Looking way more disheveled than the DVD print (which was cobbled together from several sources itself), a quick comparison of the two shows how these types of films can be done right on DVD. The DVD retains all of the grainy charm with none of the murkiness. Not that you’ll ever watch this version, but none of the bloodshed appears to be cut. Whoopee!
FINAL THOUGHTS
Listen, The Slayer wasn’t half bad...just kinda half good. Obscurity reigns here in the States, so as a lost 80s slasher, the film serves its purpose: one night’s decent entertainment. Don’t spend a lot of time or money trying to nab it and all should be well.
— Joseph A. Ziemba, 09.01.05 | 
Slayed dreams
Kay gets tough
Breathtaking
Ladies: do not kiss
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